DAYS OF HEALING
Days of Healing is a body of work I created in response to a series of traumatic events that happened to me over one year. These events included the sudden death of a dear friend, the loss of my beloved Granny and something else that I'm not quite ready to share. It was a relentless year of chaos and loss; at points I didn't know how to make sense of anything. I didn't know how to cope. Through art I have been able to process what happened, I have been able to give space to my emotions. My intentions for this exhibition was to show all sides of my grieving, the ugly angriness, the unbearable numbness, the guilt, the calm, the acceptance. Trauma and grief can be very isolating, it feels like no one can understand. I hope that this exhibition can allow people to relate to emotions I felt, and to feel okay with giving those emotions the space they need. To not push anguish deep down, to feel it, to acknowledge it and heal from it.
I remember when I got the call about my friend. I was in the photography museum. My phone buzzed and when I heard Laura's voice I knew something was wrong. When she told me I remember screaming down the phone. I ran down endless stairs and burst out onto the street. I stood there with hundreds of people walking past me and just wailed. I didn't care who saw me, I don't remember how I got home.
I think this journey has really been about connecting to myself again. I find that my work now is mirroring the work I used to make as a teenager. I think that girl got lost in the chaos for a long time. Her voice is flourishing back up now.
I WISH I COULD CRY
I remember having days and weeks where I just didn't feel anything. I felt guilty that I wasn't upset, everyone around me seemed to be wailing in pain and I felt nothing. I think I was in shock, I think my body didn't know what to do so it just shut down.
To view the whole body of work, download the pdf